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Fear of Trying Again
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When your mind is screaming out for you to run away and you are locked in a world of fear, emptiness, isolation and numbness would you choose to ever revisit such a place if you had managed to escape? If you have had postnatal depression and are contemplating having another child this can be the dilemma you face. Women who have had postnatal illness have a 1:4 chance of it reoccurring. For the severest form of postnatal illness, Puerperal Psychosis, the statistic is 1:2. However, many women choose to face the odds and have another child.
There are important ways in which a woman can empower herself during a future pregnancy. Initially, she must be as honest with herself about her past experiences as well as with immediate family and friends. Honesty is essential if those around her are to learn how best to support her. The beginning of the empowering process is to talk openly about the postnatal depression and the fears for the future. If a woman identifies her greatest fears then they can be counteracted with appropriate support. Some women turn to specialised postnatal illness counselling to lay to rest unresolved traumas. This can work hand in hand with accessing maternity services including the G.P, midwife and health visitor to name but a few who can monitor the situation. Structures also need to be put in place for the emotional well-being of the father and child/children during this period of planning. The use of family, friends as well as key voluntary services who work with postnatal illness can ensure that everyone's needs are met.
Whilst in reality it may not be possible to prevent postnatal illness reoccurring, by implementing more support from family, friends and professionals the experience may be less harrowing and more manageable. The fear of facing postnatal illness can be likened to going into battle ill equipped and out numbered. By empowering a woman with the knowledge of how to create a team of support around her, she then has all the necessary tools, skills and support structures to beat postnatal illness and recover.
We are running a one day workshop Postnatal Illness -The Fear of Trying Again on November 15 2008. Details can be found on our website-
www.postnatalillnesscounselling.co.uk
Yvonne Adams and Charlotte Wilmer-Barbrook
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